Deadline day is here! How very exciting! Well, a bit exciting. OK, not that exciting. Fine, actually it’s a pretty tedious construct where nothing of much consequence happens other than highly organised, well-funded football clubs run around trying to grab players at the last minute and lots of Sky reporters stand around in the cold.
BUT, there are still a few hours of potential transfers to come, so let’s have a look at what might still happen today. Well, while all the talk around Chelsea has been around the potential departures of Eden Hazard and Callum Hudson-Odoi, everyone’s been forgetting about lil’ ol’ Willian. Not PSG though, who are apparently mulling themselves over a bid for the Brazilian winger at the very last minute. Hmmm.
And frankly it sounds like Chelsea will be providing something of a player buffet this 31 January: West Ham have nudged aside the egg & cress sandwiches and wondered if Olivier Giroud is worth loading on to their plate, while they also glanced past the cheese & pineapple on cocktail sticks to see Danny Drinkwater is there too, slightly curling up at the edges but still worthy of a nibble. And what’s that, just next to the crescent of crisps? Why, it’s Michy Batshuayi, upon whom Everton are also said to be keen. The Hammers, meanwhile, have supposedly turned their nose up at the £7million offered to them by Valencia for Javier Hernández.
One incoming at Chelsea might be Abdoulaye Doucouré, which would be interesting. The Mirror reckons that the midfielder, conveniently missing from their defeat to Tottenham with a bit of a knock, is the man Maurizio Sarri wants to knit things back together again.
The done thing is now for young English talent to do one Germany-wards, and Emile Smith Rowe is nothing if not fashionable: he’s off to RB Leipzig on loan, it says here. Arsenal meanwhile haven’t quite officially bagged Denis Suárez from Barcelona yet (even though Barcelona sort of confirmed it), but it sounds like just crossed ts and dotted lower-case js there.
Crouchy might not be having his nachos, but he could be heading back to the Premier League. What remarkable scenes. With Stoke v v v v v keen on taking Sam Vokes from Burnley, our old friend Peter Crouch might be the grease for that particular wheel, included as a sweetener in a potential £9million deal.
Naturally Tottenham aren’t going to sign anyone, because why would they do something as vulgar as that? One or two might be heading out the door, mind, including Vinny Janssen, a potential target for Cardiff.
Newcastle are going absolutely berserk: not content with signing one player – Paraguay playmaker Miguel Almirón, whose move should in theory be completed today – they might be signing two. Two! Imagine. Nantes winger Anthony Limbombe is the new apple of their eye, and could come in today.
The achingly unlucky Tyrone Mings, his Bournemouth career having been broadly banjaxed by injury, is on his bike: a host of Championship clubs were keen, including Derby County and Nottingham Forest, but by the sounds of things he’s off to Aston Villa on loan for the rest of the season. Speaking of loans to the Champo, Leicester’s Andy King is a wanted man, with Derby again in the frame, but Swansea also keen.
Finally, this won’t be one for today, but the super soaraway Currant Bun reckons Real Madrid are raiding their piggy bank in the hope of finding £100m to spend on Marcus Rashford. In entirely unrelated news, Rashford is currently in contract negotiations with Manchester United.