Football transfer rumours: Arsène Wenger to replace Sam Allardyce?

Jacob Steinberg on 9 May 2018

Everton have sensationally lined up Arsène Wenger as Sam “11/10” Allardyce’s replacement. One pint of wine for Monsieur Arsène please! Actually, though, the Mill has a better idea: job share. Allardyce and Wenger together at last, working in tandem, just like Gérard Houllier and Roy Evans, only with genuine mutual antipathy. Wenger could sarcastically call himself Big Arsène, while Allardyce could answer every question with: “Look, in today’s society”. The Mill gives it no more than three months, with the end coming when Allardyce refers to Wenger as assistant to the senior manager after a 10-0 defeat to Chelsea, but it would probably be the greatest time of our lives.

Unfortunately Everton might have other ideas. Wenger is a long shot, after all, and it would be foolish for them not to have an alternative. Porto’s Sérgio Conceição is another option to replace Allardyce, whose final act at Goodison Park could be to push Wayne Rooney out of the door. Wazziesta’s representatives have been talking to DC United and the former England captain could move to America when the MLS transfer window opens on 10 July. Bradley Wright-Phillips would finally have a worthy rival.

Now that Yaya Touré has knocked Manchester United off their effing perch – to paraphrase his line in today’s papers – the Ivorian can think about his next move. Burnley, Everton and Wolves are all interested in signing the Manchester City midfielder on a free. Wolves also want Milan’s André Silva, although the 22-year-old striker is also a target for Monaco, who could send Radamel Falcao to the San Siro in return.

Manchester City want a new winger. Deep breath: they’ve lined up Leicester’s Riyad Mahrez, Bayer Leverkusen’s Leon Bailey, Ajax’s Justin Kluivert, Chelsea’s Eden Hazard, Borussia Dortmund’s Christian Pulisic and Sporting Lisbon’s Gelson Martins. But United are also eyeing Pulisic and could include Anthony Martial as part of a deal for the Dortmund winger. Even though José Mourinho totally loves Martial and would like nothing more than to see the forward flourish under his patient, caring tutelage.

Mohamed Salah has had a couple of iffy games, so Liverpool have decided he’s yesterday’s man. Jürgen Klopp has met Lyon’s Nabil Fekir, who could move to Anfield for £61.5m.

Newcastle fancy Craig Dawson for £15m now that West Brom are down. Brighton have had a £10m bid for Werder Bremen’s Thomas Delaney rejected.

QPR are poised to replace Ian Holloway with Steve McClaren. Unless Arsenal get there first.

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